You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
