I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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