I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
