Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
