so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Randomize
