so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
