Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize