did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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