Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
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