ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
