I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
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