I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
