if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Fuck me I smell like cheese
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
