My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
