No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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