Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
