I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
