I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
