Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize
