i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
