Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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