Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
