new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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