How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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