I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
