his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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