is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
people are starting to question the shark bite story
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
