He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I could fuck to npr.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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