i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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