I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
