I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
