East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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