Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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