i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
