i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
my sisters under your porch take her home
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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