I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
