thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
