then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better not be in your backpack
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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