i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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