TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
