Texts From Last Night

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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.

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  (504): Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time. http://tfl.nu/sw6g
  Replies (18) Good night (749) Bad night (1809)
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  (914): View more from New York

  We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.

  (1-914): View more from New York

  Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award

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  (914): We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream. (1-914): Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award http://tfl.nu/nl5u
  Replies (7) Good night (4441) Bad night (478)
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  (516): View more from New York

  im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test

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  (516): im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test http://tfl.nu/0qhc
  Replies (79) Good night (53018) Bad night (2385)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.

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  (772): I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die. http://tfl.nu/szbq
  Replies (26) Good night (901) Bad night (3839)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?

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  (727): I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what? http://tfl.nu/li5i
  Replies (37) Good night (5276) Bad night (2165)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving

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  (678): So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving http://tfl.nu/h9li
  Replies (28) Good night (959) Bad night (8028)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash

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  (708): Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash http://tfl.nu/zsge
  Replies (6) Good night (3451) Bad night (1070)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers

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  (512): She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers http://tfl.nu/jy5e
  Replies (11) Good night (1985) Bad night (3492)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?

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  (401): I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple? http://tfl.nu/ri0o
  Replies (2) Good night (2005) Bad night (1435)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.

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  (484): You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night. http://tfl.nu/9q4k
  Replies (9) Good night (3285) Bad night (825)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this

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  (540): I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this http://tfl.nu/doar
  Replies (5) Good night (2182) Bad night (677)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.

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  (910): Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here. http://tfl.nu/sd9v
  Replies (1) Good night (1043) Bad night (387)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom

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  (913): did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom http://tfl.nu/xnj2
  Replies (5) Good night (2044) Bad night (487)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel

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  (603): I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel http://tfl.nu/5thv
  Replies (5) Good night (687) Bad night (307)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?

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  (617): Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment? http://tfl.nu/2ow0
  Replies (2) Good night (630) Bad night (301)

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