another moral hangover. fuck.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!