Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given