420 ftw
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
