remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
