jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
