Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Pooping to opera.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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