Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
