I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
