I can tuck mytits in my pants
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize