Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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