her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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